Talking About The Guy Consent
“Consent is important” this is the voice echoing back and forth and certainly, consent is important.
On my way as I was waiting in the queue, I saw a girl and a guy, I suppose they were siblings. The girl was pinching the guy and the guy right away said, “don’t do it,” she did not stop and continued. The guy then said, “It is all about #MeToo moment nowadays, you better watch your back before doing anything that makes me uncomfortable.”
As a bystander witnessing all this I realized, surely this is a movement which should have made its way a long time back and consent should be taught from early ages but at the same time why have we taught our girls that it is okay for them to feel uncomfortable whereas the same rule does not apply for the boys?
Confused? If a guy stares at a girl he is a creep but if the roles are reversed and a girl is staring at the guy then the guy should feel flattered. There is little to zero concept of the fact that the guy could feel uncomfortable too!
In a group of friends when the girl says, “mujhey haath key mazaaq nae pasand” (I don’t like any physical contact, at all not even a handshake) then that is very much respected whereas, girls go around patting guys’ backs when they are laughing without asking them if they are okay with it, why? If a guy opposes to the idea of being touched by a person of the opposite sex then he is mocked. Why do different rules apply for both when this century is all about equality?
It does not end here, reading so many articles online and then checking the comment sections; I believe the comment sections give one another perception of the picture. Men are being mocked for wanting more from their wives, sexually and at the same time women are encouraged to put across their needs in front of their husbands and if the spouse is unable to fulfill them then again he is degraded. Why? Only women are the ones who come up with headaches and not men? How can one expect the man to always be in the mood just because the movies, articles, and books say so when the women have been crying their lungs out that everything seen and read is not true!
Definitely, in almost every household, it is witnessed that the boy is encouraged to have a girlfriend whereas the girl is not even allowed to talk to guys, why? According to the desi norms and culture a guy can go have fun with other girls, it is all normal and cool. Sitting and making sexist jokes is also fine. Whereas the same household restricts their girl because they don’t want their little princess to get her heart broken by a guy who would just be playing with her since boys will be boys. Whereas the same people are upbringing the boy of their family in the same manner!
The kind of guy they want their daughter to be away from is the exact same guy they are breeding in their home, how ironic is that? Also, the guy is not asked whether he wants a girl he is just told that if he is single then he is a disgrace to the masculinity kind. It is something imposed on him and his mind is brainwashed from a very young age. At times guys are in relations just because they have to not because they want to. Talk about a tough life and keeping up with the expectations of society.
These are, however, just among the few examples.
Consent is not just limited to the females, men have just as much the right to feel offended and uncomfortable and say it out loud that STOP. Enough with the masculinity where the men have to suppress their feelings and pull out a façade.